steady now...

I N T U I T I O N

that bitch April

So, April's been a real up and down month for me. For instance, I finally get my first piece accepted for publication since becoming an MFA student. It's a book review for a decent literary magazine with a strong online presence as well as a physical circulation of about 22,000. So, that was pretty good. Below is an example of my acceptance letter. Note: the letter shown below might be dramatized a little. Just a lil' bit...

But then, a little later in the month I find out I'm not getting the Graduate Assistantship for next semester that I sorely needed to help sort out my financial situation (and this despite having a really good interview).

So that sucked. It sucked particularly hard because I'm sure my resume wasn't really even looked at. I know this because I wasn't even emailed the bad news to the address indicated on my resume-- I had to contact them after not hearing. Also, when the email did finally come to tell me that I didn't get selected, it was suggested that I try to get more experience by working at place X, when I already have experience working at place X. Obviously they would've known that had they actually paid any attention to my resume. So that was frustrating. I mean, if you have your darlings already picked out, then fine, I could probably live with that. Just don't waste my time, you know? 

But then, some good news comes: I win 1st place in a literary award contest! It's given to me on April 27.

But, alas, alas! This joy is short lived. I get denied state residency based on some bullshit technicality, which means I'll have to continue paying out-of-state tuition for another year. 

That means I pay double. I could barely hack it this past year, so another year of this will be extremely trying. Sigh. 

April, in short, has been an absolute bitch.

PARKING

Yep. February.

Job Karma?

I've been living in California for about 6 months now, and I've still yet to land a job. It's been pretty frustrating. I need to find employment soon, as I only have enough money to last until May (and that's if I can keep to the strict "ramen and cereal" budget I've devised for myself). Also, it's hard to write when you're constantly thinking about your funds running out, so I haven't been doing much writing. Starving artist, my ass! When you're starving, you have no time to be an artist, or a writer, or much of anything except miserable.

I have to admit I haven't been much of an employee in the past. I wonder if my current woes aren't just because of the crappy economy, but also some sort of "job karma." I've done a lot of silly things in the past. Here, let these stick-figure panels give you a few examples of the type of worker I once was...

I used to work as a lot porter in high school, where I'd have to drag a water hose around and carry a bucket of soap, a sponge, and a chamois on me to wash cars in the hot Nevada sun. It was a very physically demanding job, and after a while I began to take prolonged breaks in the shade. I'd overturn my soap bucket, use it as a seat, and smoke the cigarettes I stole from the car salesmen (whose offices I had to clean). Soon I began to tuck a novel in my back pocket to read on my breaks. There were days when the amount of chapters read surpassed the amount of cars washed. But at least I was still staying on the general work property. The same couldn't be said at some of my other jobs. For example...

So, yeah, I did that. I was a goofy kid at times. Back then, I just plain didn't care about work. I've held jobs since I was fifteen and a half, but never one that I really enjoyed. They were all boring, or hard work for little pay, or the bosses were complete jackasses who treated the employees like imbeciles. Basically, I knew my little antics were wrong, but I felt like my employers deserved it-- like if they didn't respect me, then I didn't have to respect them either. I also admit that I felt "better" than the jobs I had. I was young and cocky. Needless to say, I never held on to a job for very long. Some of my "reasons" for quitting jobs are pretty much legend among my friends. For example:

There are more, but I'm not up to creating any more of these little panels. 

I need to get back to searching for a job. Can I beat my job karma? I'll just have to wait and see, I guess.

2011 comes to an end...

So. My first semester as an MFA student at San Jose State has come to an end. Here's how I did:

I'd say that this was a decent semester. Academically, at least. Everything else-- not so much. However, although I wasn't able to snag a job and struggled a bit financially, I did finally manage to move to a new apartment with my cousins. This will save me a bit of money, and it is definitely quieter. In other news, my folks and my brother came to visit me here in San Jose for the holidays, which was really nice. I hadn't noticed how lonely I'd been until they showed up. When they were here I was so happy to have them around, I kept trying to show them everything, bring them everywhere-- there wasn't enough time in the day to do everything I wanted to do with them. They were here looking towards a relaxing vacation, and there I was tiring them out. Ha! They probably left completely exhausted. Well, anyway it was nice having them for the holidays, and they helped me to put these past few months of ridiculous struggle out of my mind. So...

I hope I have a better 2012.  No... I'll make sure I have a better 2012.  Ah, yes... I can see it now... 2012 will the year of:  my first job in San Jose, my first "real" story publication, the completion of the first draft of my book, and perhaps, my first girlfriend in quite a while. Should be good...